Sri Raja Rajeshwari

Yesterday had a dream in which Sri Raja Rajeshwari appeared to me.
I have neither worshipped this lordess before nor did I know much about her.
The dream goes this way.

My mother, sister and I go to this house of a old age couple for a kind of healing.
The old man had his fingers cut and he placed his hand on my hand.
On placing his hand on my hand, his entire hand impression was made on my hand.
The old man withdrew his hand but his hand impression was there on my hand.
Now I focussed the old man's hand on my hand and automatically the fingers that were cut grew in a moment.
I was amazed by this growing fingers and showed it to my mother who was sitting next to me.

Later, I started walking through the old couple's house. When I started walking, colours of winds passed from my hands into the
house of this couple as if to cleanse the entire house. The colours were great and evenly spread the entire house in a rhythmic fashion.
Later, the force made me sit at the 'prayer' room of this couple, where Sri Raja Rajeshwari began to talk to me.
The image inititally was only the cavity of mouth, round with the red skin and the teeth talking to me.
After sometime, however she came down and sat in front of me.
I prayed to her and asked her to bless me so that she will appear whenever I call her.
The lordess smiled as if it was a sensation of surity and the energy of the lordess began to withdraw into the idol in front.
I intuitively knew that it was "Sri Raja Rajeshwari".

After the Goddess went away, I was so happy in the dream that I proclaimed I have achieved the essence of human life, immortality
There is no more fear of anything now. There is no more fear of anything now.

The dream completed and I woke up in the morning and recollected the dream back so that I wont forget.

My experiences and Buddhism !

Just read yesterday a book - "The Bliss of Inner Fire: Heart Practice of the Six Yogas of Naropa" and the author clearly explains my state.

I."Success in inner fire meditation causes all the winds to first enter the central channel, then stabilize. What is the sign that the airs have become stable ? Breathing becomes subtle and subtle, the movement of breath through the nostrils stops completely and the abdomen stops to move"

II. "Absorption of the air energies in the central channel is the next phase. With the stabilization of winds in the channel our concentration and bliss would increase. The energies then begin to absorb and we experience the stages of dissolution that happen naturally at the time of death."

Dreams & Kundalini !

In many of the posts I had read about Kundalini, dreams were given a greater place and many of them were able to relate their dreams to Kundalini. I thought this was a more of extrapolation or interpretation and the tendency of human mind to explain everything logically. Hence, I didnt relate the dreams of snakes etc much.

However, I am having increased dreams with snakes in it. Yesterday, I had the pitch black snake with many hooded stand up and hiss. I could actually see the many hooded snake though there was no fear. I previously thought that it was more of what we thought that would reappear in dreams. But I have never had dreams with snake before and off late they are increasing.

Hence, dreams should have some logic in them ?

The nature of Bliss

What is the nature of Bliss that Kundalini brings in ?
What is it that maketh this energy addictive more than any drug or alcohol?

Firstly, the bliss brought about by this energy is continuos. The level of bliss might be reduced at times but it comes up automatically. An increase in Prana automatically brings up increased Prana in the head and this inturn acts on the brain to give bliss. Thus the bliss is continuos and one can be easily lost in this bliss as it is addictive similar to any other trance inducing substances.

Secondly, there is no loss of consciousness due to the bliss. Yes, it induces you into a trance like state, but you can still manage to force yourself and manage. However, the thinking is definitely much hampered because of the thinking and it is not active as without Kundalini.

Thirdly, the bliss brings in a sense of love and compassion. For example, today I had been out with my friends to McDonalds. We had our Burger and were walking out and lo the Prana increased (because of the food?) and it acted on the brain in such a way that I felt that we are all wasting our life. A feeling of love encompasses such that you dont want to talk anymore and want to remain in silence. You feel that whatever is happening is not real and feel a 10 fold increase in devotion and I start chanting Lord's name because of the bliss.

Fourthly, when this happens I start observing the Prana and its rotations in the head and this over sometime brings in Kundalini from the base as my breathe slows down.

The bliss brought out is the purest. You feel mad that you want to have your loved one but you can't have it.

Price of Kundalini

I was really worried about my job and the materialistic loss I had because of Kundalini. However, when I put this question to Chrism, he asked me one simple question - "How much money can you give and purchase Kundalini?". "How do I value Kundalini ?"

It is so stupid of me that I told Kundalini is not bliss and I wanted to correct that statement and hence I put this post again. Yes, Kundalini takes away all your materialistic pleasures. Yes, I might not concentrate at times. I might not have the best of the facilities that I could have without Kundalini. But Kundalini is dearest to me. The bliss that it gives is something that I do not want to lose regardless of anything else in the world. It is a question of choice between Kundalini and everything else. I have chosen Kundalini and I will in the future. I can't have both and I am ready to leave everything in this world to have this wonderful process running in me and take care of me and put me in bliss. I will never crib again and I will surrender.
I will leave everything in this world for Kundalini.
I will leave everything in this world for Kundalini.
I will leave everything in this world for Kundalini.

A job in hand !

I came into this b-school with much expectations. An investment banking job, dashing cars and a posh life. However, I have finally accepted an offer which is the first company on the campus without much thinking. This was the easiest job in the campus for my profile and many of my friends knew I deserved more and I had few giggles at my selection. But the effect of Kundalini has made me forget those investment banking jobs.Infact, right from the day I have been in the Kundalini process, I couldn't concentrate much on any of the finance subjects. During the selection process also, I thought about my inability in activating my left brain at times and hence chose a consulting company instead of i-banking job. It sounds foolish but Kundalini has not left me any choice.

Kundalini can block activities in the right or left brain. During peak activity, the entire brain is lit up by prana and you are left in a state of trance, wherein I cant think much. I don't know if it is a blessing or curse. My brain is changing and it is. It is difficult to explain this in verbal to anyone but it is. However, while I am in the campus, I act as though everything is normal and I am normal.

Prana & the full moon

I do not know if I am able to sense Prana or kundalini in the head. The confusion arises because of the two situations.

a. There are Pranic sensations in the head and they get violent and make the breathe stop, pulling the Kundalini from the base of the spine. However,this energy does make it way through the spine to the brain. Hence, the energy at the head should be both Prana and Kundalini.

b. Still the difference between Kundalini and Prana is not known. Have read it somewhere that Kundalini is the inner essence of Prana.

Whatever it is, this process or energy gets violent during the full moon. The energy gets so mad that it works at a very fast pace. It is like too much energy trying to do something by rotating and movements at a very fast pace. The effect of Full moon on the oceans is well known. So is the effect of moon on prana. We are definitely affected by the planets. Astrology has to be believed definitely.

The Process in me

When I get up in the morning, the prana in my head is very less.
However, as the day peaks up the prana increases in my head - either because of the food I eat or because of the absorption of atmospheric prana.

With the increase in prana in the head, the breathing automatically comes down and facilitates Kevala kumbhaka.This facilitation of Kevala Kumbhaka brings in Kundalini from the base of the spine into the head.This sets in a cyclic process of reducing breath and at the same time bringing in more prana.

The Kundalini at the brain in the form of prana, not only helps get more prana by the pressure exerted but also helps in working at the different parts of the brain. This results in bliss